The Awesome Valentine Baby
by Karhien
Summary: Usually, you get your girlfriend pregnant at Valentine's Day. But for Gilbert, he gets his first child from his awesome wife at that day instead. My "Spain's" Gift (AKA Daniela's late birthday gift)


**Well, of course I'm late for another birthday gift and didn't actually have time since school is sucking my life and my laziness is overcoming… Yeah, not it's not great...**

**So, sorry Daniela for the late gift and I hope you had a wonderful birthday. Really, I am.**

* * *

Gilbert is awesome, obviously.

So everything he should do is awesome, right?

But there's one thing that even the most awesome could never do…

Handle on unplanned pregnancy and a hormonal and bitchier Hungarian with a skillet or pan as her deadly weapon…

Then again, awesome people are used to get physically attacked by a deadly weapon. Just because they are awesome of course. There's that and have hot and wild sex.

But it seems the last time Gilbert got dirty with his childhood friend-enemy thing _slash_ long-time girlfriend to recent wife-bitch thing, Elizabeta was acting weird. Well, she was acting weirder than her usual yaoi-obsessed self… Then again, Gilbert first thought that she wasn't exactly satisfied with the surprise role-play Gilbert did as a holy (_pff_ holy…) and mighty holy Prussian king…

His starting line wasn't as awesome as he…

"_As the king, I get what I want, right?"_

It did make him sound like a wuss… But then again, Gilbert had to do it. He had to return that hot sexy demon nurse role-play that Elizabeta did… That was both hot and awesome…

But enough of hot, awesome, and awesomely arousing role-play, for Gilbert should really do something with the pregnant Hungarian wife…

He really should have noticed the recent attacks of the dreaded frying pan changed where somehow "laughing too hard" was right enough reason… He could still feel the most recent one where "drinking too much beer" and "not paying attention" was the reason… Then again, Gilbert should have kept his awesome mouth shut and not insult a very dangerous and deadly Hungarian wife or he wouldn't feel the other and more horrible pain that is acting on his awesome Prussian jewels…

But the only big clue that he gotten from his wife was… well, she actually apologizing…

Sure Gilbert didn't fully notice it at first with a once-possible bleeding wound from his head and blue balls that accompany his five meters but he did! And boy, how un-awesomely awkward it was holding your somehow crying and sobbing wife as she screams apologizes and curses at you…

But hell it was un-awesomely awkward as fuck!

Gilbert first fell for Elizabeta due to her passion and strength. Even as kids, even when Gilbert first believed she was a guy, she had always been passionate and strong. She would try her hardest to do what she wants and get what she wants, from showing she's boss as a little oblivious tomboy kid to getting pictures of male to male intimacy as a hormonal and _very_ well-endowed woman.

But there are a few things the Hungarian can't have…

One is being painless during pregnancy…

"Gilbert! My back hurts!"

And she isn't the only one suffering…

Gilbert tries to help, actually trying to treat her "fragile". Elizabeta is getting really close and today is… uh, wait, what today is again? He doesn't know but Elizabeta is getting near to finally letting out the awesome baby out.

"Yeah, yeah! The awesome me is coming!"

And Gilbert isn't going to lose his un-awesome anger.

It's Valentine's Day.

* * *

Gilbert can't do un-awesome cooking since explosions are awesome and he is awesome for making awesome explosions, even if he accidently made one last time he tried. And since Elizabeta is busy carrying an un-awesome baby as well as most likely mercilessly throwing pans as usual behavior but with scary, bitchy pregnancy… it is where Elizabeta is the psycho killer with the knife while Gilbert is the screaming bitch with a nice rag, Ludwig had came to make their Valentines dinner.

Though Ludwig lost his appetite after Elizabeta's pregnancy appetite requests are made, it's a nice dinner. Gilbert gets to drink precious beer while Elizabeta is scarfing down weird dishes. And Gilbert got Elizabeta to laugh even though her back or other parts of her body hurt time from time.

This was way better than the time they went on their first date. It turns out a bar is a worst place for a date though Elizabeta did admit she liked it a bit since she won a daily arm-wrestling contest and won a few "drinking" money. Though Gilbert was embarrassed that she had to drag his unconscious drunken body out of the place…

It was an awesome miracle that she didn't dump him and went back to the snooty, secretly PMS-ing brat known as Roderich after that date.

"So," Ludwig begins, after Elizabeta went for a nap. "She's getting there, isn't she?"

"Ja! I'm going to have an awesome baby soon!"

"Have you been reading the book I sent you when I was away in the meeting?"

"Which one? The one about handling pregnancy or the one about changing un-awesome diapers? Both are un-awesome."

Ludwig sighs, definitely disappointed with the awesome answer. He was way too boring stick in the ass younger brother to be awesome but somehow Gilbert loves him… as a _brother_.

His wife had actually made him teach himself to squeak without double meanings, especially ones with his brother and prude Roderich. Especially with his brother…

"I'm surprised she said yes when you proposed to her…especially since you were almost fully naked…"

"Hey! I wasn't going to show Awesome Junior to the world! I'm way too awesome for that!"

"You mean like the time when you told Feliciano you were playing hide the bratwurst with Elizabeta?"

"It was so freaking worth it after that awesome, hilarious spit-take that did! _"Ve, I want to play hide the bratwurst with Ludwig!"_ Freaking priceless! Kesesesese!"

"Freaking?"

"Lizzy wanted me to not curse, even though the baby is still in that stomach of hers."

"Womb."

"Whatever." Gilbert shrugs, luckily not immediately remembering of the "wonderful" effort that Elizabeta did to make sure he was "censored". Gilbert bets that when the baby gets out, every curse that comes will be censored with sound of a pan banging on an unfortunate awesome head…

Gilbert takes another sip (tall can) of beer while teasing Ludwig.

Pff, Ludwig couldn't drink since he has to drive home! Please! Gilbert once got so wasted that he didn't caught from one cop at all! They were too busy trying to arrest all those street riders than to stop one loud cackling awesome naked driver who might have thrown accidently a beer bomb on that one cop. It was so worth it, even though Gilbert can barely remember a shit about it.

The only non-drinking time that Gilbert now remembers is one of his favorite moments is his wedding day. Elizabeta was beautiful, not just hot and sexy, in the wedding dress of hers. It was almost awesome if Gilbird wouldn't have flown around so much behind his wife since the awesome speech was hold by her beak (it was her ever since Elizabeta told her frightening theory of bird yaoi…) and all Gilbert could do is try to read without moving so much. Soon, the priest couldn't take it and laughed with the rest of the audience while Elizabeta pretends not to notice.

But it was all in good fun, for Elizabeta had a camera with her and took a good picture of West actually smiling! She is indeed awesome like that.

Gilbert should then get that weird yaoi manga for their anniversary since Elizabeta did a hell lot of cuss words that even made the priest blush from all those wrinkles of his. Gilbert somehow suppressed himself from laughing as Elizabeta went on while Francis, being the Frenchman that he still is, surrendered and laughed the whole way through.

"So…" Ludwig begins again. "You're going to be a father soon… Aren't you at any lest nervous about it? Raising a child is a huge responsibility, bruder."

"Like I don't know that."

"Bruder, I got you that book for a reason."

Gilbert immediately glares at Ludwig.

"_Hey_, I took care of you after you got out of the hospital. I know from awesome experience how to take care of a child."

"You let me hold a gun…"

"Hey! It wasn't _fully_ loaded!"

"I nearly shot the family dog…"

"Look West, it was an accident that the safety wasn't on and no one got hurt. You wanted to hold the gun and I let you hold the gun.

Then again…it might have shorted that weird un-awesome habit of yours of reading un-awesome books…"

Ludwig just rolls his eyes, but didn't deny. Gilbert lets out a chuckle.

It's been some time that Gilbert gets to tease his "little" bruder. Then again, Ludwig always busies himself with work, exercise, and extremely kinky porn that he should really hide in a better place. And he had improved his security way too much too…

If Ludwig wasn't awake that time, Gilbert might have been arrested…

And Elizabeta, the _pregnant_ Hungarian, wouldn't like that…

Seriously, anything pregnant is more un-awesomely scary than anything… _not_ pregnant. But Gilbert loves Elizabeta, skillets and all.

Elizabeta had (well, still have awesomely) the thing about her where she can be gentle and caring like a woman while able to do an awesome 180 of a badass angry man warrior. Francis would joke it as bipolarity but even pregnant Hungarians scare the piss out of him.

But even without pregnancy, Elizabeta wouldn't let anyone take her down, take an advantage of her, and from horrible experience, get a free feel. One of the things that's awesome about Elizabeta.

"But really," Ludwig un-awesomely interrupts Gilbert's thought process mumbo jumbo. "Shouldn't you feel anxious about what it is about to come? You might have "raised" me when I was young but I was old enough to think and defend for myself. A baby…it's…well…"

"Luddy," Gilbert interrupts back and smirking back and smirking a little as his bruder's face sours at the nickname, "There's no way the awesome me is going to be un-awesomely nervous about taking care of _my_ child! And besides, Lizzy will be there with me!"

Ludwig sighs and pinches his nose. Arschloch…

"You really shouldn't say that and be okay, bruder. You will most likely be–"

"FUCK! FUCK FUCKING FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!"

"Actually the word would fu–I mean, freaked, Luddy."

"Uh…that wasn't me…"

"…Oh freak…"

"GILBERT! YOU NO-GOOD PIECE OF GERMAN SHIT! IT'S TIME! IT'S FUCKING –FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!"

Somewhere in Valentine's Day, there are two German brothers (one being an awesome Prussian of course) trying to handle a pregnant Hungarian who is in pain and ready to give birth until…

"Hey, do you think the hospital will actually have those hot babe nurses, We–"

_DONG!_

…And now somewhere in Valentine's Day…

A rather irritated German drives with a Hungarian in labor cussing out every curse word there is in the world while a certain albino is unconscious of a frying pan…

Brilliant…

* * *

"Don't worry sirs, Elizabeta will be alright and the baby is fine… and that head injury will recover just fine."

Gilbert pouts. Even though he has already forgiven his wife's quick temper strike and is bit way too used to it, Gilbert didn't like waiting.

One, he is now a father, an awesome father to be exact. But two, hospital people are taking too fucking long on examining his awesome child!

Luckily it turns out Ludwig is a good little brother by helping his temporarily unconscious body to "comfort" Elizabeta. But of course, Gilbert didn't get to hold his firstborn due to being unconscious and have a broken hand from Elizabeta. So now, Gilbert has to wait to actually see his awesome child while nurses are giggling that he un-awesomely fainted during the delivery…So un-awesome and so not true…

"Will the husband of Elizabeta Beilschmitt come here please?"

Oh good! He gets to see his wife without the belly!

Sure Gilbert loves his wife even if she's "getting fat" but Gilbert is a man, an awesome man with a huge–

"She's in room 59, your daughter is there with her."

Gilbert can't help but pout inwardly. He has nothing against daughters, really. It might be because if he had a son, he would immediately name him Fredrick, AKA "Fritz" after his hero of course. And then there's that promise slash bet that he made with Antonio to name the now daughter Daniela.

It's not a bad name, it just wasn't Prussian. There's that and the name was his mother's which is pretty…yeah…

But maybe Gilbert could put Daniela as the middle name… Antonio never was great with specifics, good thing too.

"Gilbert…"

There she is… both of them…

"Lizzie…"

"Gil," Elizabeta answers but soon with a smirk. "It took you long enough to recover."

Gilbert can't help but snort. Of course she would say that rather be those over concerned wives that worry too much. It's one of the reasons why Gilbert loves her.

"How is my awesome wife doing? I bet she feels awesome now that he has the awesome baby out."

Elizabeta giggles and playfully flicks Gilbert on the forehead. After that she put her hand back to cradling the baby. Oh the baby looks so awesomely cute! She has Lizzie's hair while her eyes are still shut tight, looking like she's sleeping through the cradling. She looks pale, but then again that would be Gilbert's share of awesome genetics which is pretty cool but that means more sunscreen to purchase.

But here she is… _their_ baby… their awesome first baby of course.

And since it's a girl and he doesn't have to tell Antonio or Liz about anything just yet…

"Hey Liz, what you got her? We did have that weird deal the day when we found out, you know, the one about naming the baby and the weapon of choice they use."

Elizabeta rolls her eyes and has that bad/good mischievous look on her as if she had a secret hidden from her husband. Hopefully it's good though…

"I'm thinking of the name… Gillian. I always did want to see you get annoyed by yourself."

Gilbert really tries to contain his laughter after that answer. Elizabeta always did have that sick humor that at times reveals itself. But hey, she named the awesome baby after him, that's awesome enough.

So, Gillian Daniela Beilschmitt… huh, that's awesome enough for Gilbert. But…

"So, can we get another baby? I seriously want Fredrick "Fritz" Beilschmitt to happen!"

Elizabeta slaps him upside the head, giggling and glaring at her idiot husband.

But she didn't say no.

Maybe after taking care of their first child for some time… just maybe...

For now, it's time to take care of the "awesome" Valentine baby.

* * *

**This may not be the best but hopefully you like it Daniela. And again, hope you have a happy birthday.**


End file.
